Archive for biker friends

Brothel Review by Two Seasoned Bikers

Two old seasoned bikers, decide to ride into town for a little R&R.

After a few drinks, they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old guys and whispers to her manager, “go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk; I’m not wasting two of my girls on them. They won’t know the difference.’

The manager does as he is told and the two old bikers go upstairs and take care of their business.

Just before they rode off, the first biker tells his companion, ‘you know, I think my girl was dead!’

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Marine surprised by motorcycle caravan

Marine Cpl. Bobby Permer noticed one thing out of the ordinary on Sunday morning while attending services at Village Church of Gurnee: His sister, Jessica, was carrying a camcorder.

Fortunately, he was not in position to see the 20 Patriot Guard motorcycles lining up out in front, along with the color guard from the Marine Corps League Lake County Detachment 801. And Jessica was ready with an explanation for the camcorder.

“She told me an old friend of the family was outside, and she wanted to get some video,” said Permer, adding that he was completely surprised by the crowd that gathered to celebrate his return from his second deployment in Afghanistan.

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Gov. Rick Snyder proclaimed May 2011: “Motorcycle Safety Awareness Month”

By a certificate of proclamation, Gov. Rick Snyder has proclaimed May 2011 as “Motorcycle Safety Awareness Month” to remind motorists of the seasonal return of motorcycle enthusiasts to Michigan roadways. The event is supported by a legislative resolution and is being promoted by state departments and motorcycle rider groups concerned with highway safety.

The awareness campaign seeks a broader recognition of motorcycles in the transportation mix and strives to reduce the number of motorcycle accidents, injuries and deaths on state roadways. The target audience incorporates vehicle drivers and motorcycle operators. The principal concerns are to increase driver recognition of motorcyclists in traffic, while encouraging motorcyclists to participate in Motorcycle Safety Foundation training available through the Michigan Department of State.

As highway safety supporters, motorcyclists ask that motorists get in the habit of looking for motorcycles as they drive, both during the safety awareness month and throughout the riding season. We are your neighbors, friends and families. Together we can share the road safely.

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What are you afraid of?

As the Biker was pulled over (for no apparent reason) he produces his license, registration and CPL permit, handing all three to the cop.

“Okay, Mr. Smith,” the cop said, “I see your CPL permit.  Are you carrying today?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Well then, better tell me what you got.”

Smith said, “Well, I got a .357 revolver in my inside my vest pocket.  There’s a 9 mm semi-auto in my leather shoulder holster. Oh and, I’ve got a .22 magnum derringer in my right boot.”

“Okay,” the cop said.  “Anything else?”

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WOMENS BIKER BAR

A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake.

He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting
there for a while, he yells to the waiter, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde
joke?”

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky
voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it
is only fair given that you are blind — that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I’m a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional
weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

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Why Motorcycles Are Better Than Boyfriends

* My bike can go for more than one ride in an hour.

* My bike lasts longer.

* My bike will let me know if something is wrong.

* My bike doesn’t judge my friends.

* My bike doesn’t care about how many other bikes I’ve ridden.

* My bike won’t ogle other bikes.

* My bike doesn’t care about my breast size.

* I don’t have to drink beer before my motorcycle looks appealing.

* I didn’t have to go to Tiffany’s to register my bike.

* My bike doesn’t care if I’m independent, matter of fact she wants me in control.

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Understanding Motorcycle Rider Apparel

By: Martin Jack

If you love motorcycles, then chances are that you would want to cruise along the several roads and take in a different view. However, motorcycle riding can be quite dangerous, given the speed and nature of the vehicle and this is why you should invest in good quality motorcycle apparel, to help avoid accidents of any kind. Given the popularity of motorcycle riding today, there are different kinds of such apparel available in the market. However, before investing in appropriate apparel for safe motorcycle riding, it is important to understand the types, the materials used and places to buy it from, so that you only get the best for yourself and yet are not paying through your nose.

Motorcycle apparel in its broad context denotes and includes apparel like jackets, pants, chaps, boots, vests and helmets. Helmets are an integral part of safe motorcycle riding and there are several types that you can choose from, like the Shoei helmets or Bell helmets, use of which makes riding safer and more secure. However, this does not mean that the other aspects of such apparel are not important, for every piece of clothing has its uses and it is important to understand this before you invest in it.

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Traffic Fatalities Lowest Since 1950 – Motorcycle News

10NR25 – MRF News Release – Traffic Fatalities Lowest Since 1950 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE 10 September 2010
Contact: Jeff Hennie, Government Relations and Public Affairs Traffic Fatalities Lowest Since 1950 The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), a division of the United States Department of Transportation (DOT). has released the 2009 yearly traffic fatality numbers, reports the Motorcycle Riders Foundation (MRF). The report shows that traffic fatalities are at the lowest in this country since 1950. The DOT said that traffic deaths fell 9.7 percent in 2009 to 33,808, the lowest number since 1950. In 2008, an estimated 37,423 people died on the highways.

Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood called the new data “a landmark achievement for public health and safety,” but cautioned that too many people are killed on the road each year. Forty-one states, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico saw reductions in highway fatalities, led by Florida, with 422 fewer deaths, and Texas, down 405. Motorcycle-related deaths were down 16 percent, the first drop in the past 11 years, from 5,312 in 2008 to 4,462 in 2009. “Of course a one year drop is encouraging but can hardly be called a trend,” said Jeff Hennie, MRF Vice President of Government Relations and Public Affairs. “We in the motorcycling community need to continue to push for proper rider education and motorist awareness campaigns in order to establish a true trend.” Motorcycle related injuries were also down 6.3 percent from ’08 to ’09, more encouraging news. Pinning the fall in deaths to a single source is difficult. Some will say that the economic slowdown reduced vehicle travel, but that’s just not true. The vehicle miles traveled for 2009 is slightly higher than it was in 2008, about 0.2 percent.

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Ouch

A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well; however, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs in his crotch. Worried that it might be a second surgery and the doctors hadn’t told him about it, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown up enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his pubic hair and private parts were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the kind that doesn’t come off easily — if at all. Written on the tape in large black letters was the sentence, ‘Get well soon . from the nurse in the Jeep you pulled over last week.’

Tattoo Sleeve for Women

The brand-Ed Hardy clothing was originally created by Christian Audigier who was a famous rock and roll style fashion designer. The fashion designer Christian Audigier was regarded as “King of jeans.” he had been the designer of some famous brand, such as Levi’s, lee, Diesel, etc. Ed hardy women clothes are waiting for you on the market. Some of the hottest fashion has arrived with the Ed Hardy Tattoo Sleeve for Women and the Ed Hardy Women’s Hoodie – with tattoo inspired artistic styles such as the Women’s Ed Hardy “Love Kills Slowly” and “Death and Glory”, these Ed hardy women t-shirts are some of the hottest tickets to wind up 2009 and will surely only rise in popularity in 2010.

Ed Hardy Tattoo Sleeve for Women – This has the design of a short sleeve t-shirt, but with a long sleeve coming out from under the upper sleeve to stretch to the wrist with a snug feel and look. The long sleeves have a colored sheer fabric and tattoo art to give a slight appearance of an all-over-the-arm tattoo, but of course without the tattoo. The Ed hardy shirts length is below the hips and hugs the upper body without having a “too tight” look. Colors available for the Ed Hardy Tattoo Sleeve for Women include Plum, Pink, Yellow and Black – each color has its own unique design featuring a Don Ed Hardy tattoo design.

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